Dr. Cupid, Or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Celebrate Valentine’s Day Anyway (Part 3)

If you’ve come across this, it’s safe to say that you’ve already read Parts 1 and 2 of this series, where I shared the importance of gifting based on Sun/Moon signs and expression of gender identity. Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be intimidating, and expressions of love should be genuine. Knowing who you’re buying for helps a lot in both regards, so ease your mind, read on, and allow me to be your gifting fairy godmother.

Finally, for the masc infatuated, thank you for staying with me:

Aries:

Badass Moto Gear

If the name itself doesn’t convince you your masc Aries will love everything this brand sells, maybe I can convince you with their badass ratchet straps?

Or their badass commuter backpack that has helmet AND laptop storage?

Or the abundance of badass Jeep and motorcycle accessories? Are you getting it yet? Aries is a known badass, the igniter of adrenaline rushes, the type to get excited about ratchet straps (whether he has a truck or not) just because of the fun of ratchet straps.

All that to say, show your adrenaline junkie a little love this year by enabling them…with safety gear.

Taurus:

Peach Skin Sheets

Taurus is probably tied for best sleeper of the zodiac with Pisces, but Taurus has the added benefit of being very aware of the feel of things. An earth sign ruled by Venus, the bull enjoys the tactile, and Peach Skin Sheets really plays into that with how soft the bedding is.

It may seem like there’s not much to say about these sheets, but I’ve found, anecdotally, that those who discuss their sleep are usually doing so because its unsatisfactory. You won’t find that issue here!

You can likely find a set in his favorite color, too, with the abundance of options available.   

Gemini:

Pando

Gemini’s favorite thing in the world is to know, particularly if he gets to learn it himself! His second favorite? Friends!

If a trivia game about friends doesn’t sound right up Gemini’s alley, you might not be gifting to a Gemini. When I found out about Pando, I thought, “I can’t wait to play this with my family!” because we have way too many memories together, but still have a lot to learn! We also have quite a lot of Gemini energy represented.

With easy rules, and questions like, “Do I have a sweet or salty tooth?” or “Name a snack I always have on road trips,” this game is sure to be as fun with just you and your sweetie, as it is at your next get-together, which you know you’ll have, because you’re dating a Gemini.

Side note: I truly did not intend for both example questions to be food-related, but I am a Taurus, so here we are. 

Cancer:

SalTerrae Intimate Oils

If you’re more than newly familiar with astrology, you’ve heard of interactions between signs called “aspects.” Generally, Taurus and Cancer have a few things in common, and are able to get along relatively harmoniously. If you’re familiar with the love languages, these are two signs that respond well to physical touch. 

As we’ve covered one form of how this language aids in relaxation with Taurus, let’s dissect another with Cancer! Notorious for neglecting his needs for the sake of others, the crab needs a little extra convincing to care for himself.

Let’s be real, Cancer carries so much of the weight of the world on his shoulders, willingly, and every so often allowing him to relax is necessary. SalTerrae’s massage oils are delightful for melting away muscle aches. 

 

Leo:

Mast Hair

Leo’s are known for their fabulous heads of hair. Searching “Famous Leos” and scrolling through the pictures will have you convinced…especially Mick Jagger who I swear hasn’t lost a silky lock since he came on the scene. And when you have a head of hair like that? You do everything in your power to take care of it, so you can look like Jagger when you’re his age. Mast Hair has changed the game with hair care (everything comes in a pouch, so you know you’re not missing any coveted product) and comes in simple, but delicious scents for the manliest among us.

Even their styling products make running your fingers through his hair delightful, which we all know you do, because you’re in a relationship with a Leo.

Virgo:

Oley Hemp Coffee

If you read part two of this series, you already know about Virgos. Chances are you also know because you’re buying for one this Valentine’s Day, and you love him for his work ethic. Being driven is attractive, but the anxiety that comes with it probably makes him forget that. We both know you’re never gonna pry the coffee pot away, but you can at least get him a grind to let him enjoy a mellowed-out caffeine boost. Productivity up, anxiety down – Virgo functioning at his best!

And if I say so myself (which I do since I’m writing this), Oley Hemp’s roast is solid. Nothing fancy, just a really good cup of coffee, and a really nice kick to start the day.

Libra:

Vedic Botanicals

Libras are straight hotties. It’s scientific. The sign of the scales is known for their balance, which comes through in their symmetrical faces. Studies have shown symmetry ranks higher in attractiveness every time. And since vanity is not anything to be ashamed of, Libras know they’re hot.

Any gift they receive that plays up their “hotness” is going to be well received. Especially if it embraces natural beauty, as Vedic Botanicals does. They take their motto “From soil to skin, only goodness goes in” seriously, and what your Libra gets out of it is everything he needs to smell good, and look good.

Earthy scents can be hard to pull off, but this Venus-ruled sign does and you get to enjoy every bit of it! 

Scorpio:

Vara Wines Dulce Vermut

 

For an uncomfortable amount of time in my 20s I was convinced I was an alcoholic. Never mind the actual psychology behind alcoholism, I was concerned by how much I enjoyed imbibing, and given I dated a lot of bartenders (hey! Free drinks!) I was ready to admit I had a problem. Fast forward a healthy amount of time, and I can confidently say I don’t have a problem. I can’t speak to the state of my exes, but I can say they were all Scorpios.

Now, mistakes made when we were young aside, they were all phenomenal mixologists. I’ve since made many friends also in the sign of Scorpio, and wow, do they have a talent for craft cocktails. I mean, when the pandemic hit and she lost her job, one of my best friends decided to start making custom flavored syrups in her apartment, because why not? My fellow bartenders reading this know sweet vermouth is really only used in one of the classic cocktails, but I promise, use Vara Wine’s and that Manhattan is elevated.

Some of you may be wondering, “Why alcohol for Scorpio?” All I have to say to that is “in vino veritas,” and as we know about Scorpios by now, truth, unfettered, is all they ask of you. 

Sagittarius:

Unstable Unicorns

A popular astrology meme account on Instagram once posted a picture with the question “People who don’t like Sagittarians, why don’t you like to have fun?” It was blunt, but damn was it the truth. I’m dating a Sag, and the ways he makes me laugh, the ways he makes everything FUN is exactly what I love about him.

He hides it sometimes, because his Cancer Moon can make him shy at first, but the man knows how to have a good time. At his worst, it can be at my expense, but we have that in common, so it works for us. If you and your archer are still finding your groove in the relationship, this game is a great way to channel that deviously destructive nature.

Fair warning, there will have to be emotional ground rules before playing, because the point of the game is to be as cutthroat as possible, all in good fun. The tagline for the game is “Build a Unicorn Army. Betray your friends. Unicorns are your friends now.”

And if that doesn’t sound like the kind of “backstabby” fun you and your Sag will enjoy, I don’t know what to tell you.

Capricorn:

Braid and Wood

If Sagittarius is the desire to take over the world, Capricorn has the know-how to actually do it. Thankfully most Caps aren’t that psychotic. What they are, however, as the Cardinal Earth sign, the experts of knowing how to make things grow. Everything they set their mind to succeeds, because they take great care in their projects.

Braid and Wood makes simple, but radiant plant holders that will dress up your Capricorn’s office, which likely doesn’t have enough of that earth energy in it in the first place.

The best way to keep any Earth sign successful is to shower them with grounding energy, but especially the goat.

He needs a reminder that taking care of work isn’t necessarily taking care of the self, from time to time, and these plant holders (don’t forget to pick out the plant together!) do just that.

Aquarius:

Sherpa Chai

I know what you’re thinking, why would I get my S.O. a gift he can (theoretically) buy at the supermarket? Well one, because materialism isn’t really Aquarius’s bag, but curiosity is, and Sherpa Chai has an incredible story behind it.

A story told in founder Pemba Sherpa’s book, of his life, his heritage, and the beauty of the tallest mountains in the world. Reading the book while sipping a glass of his family’s chai recipe feels surreal, imaginative and comforting, all at the same time. It’s an otherworldly connection that your Aqua will love, and with any luck, won’t stop talking about.

So probably best to buy two copies, and have a coupley book club moment this 14th. 

 

Pisces:

The Comfy

As I’m sure you recall, I mentioned that Pisces was the other “best sleeper” of the zodiac. But unlike the bull, it’s not because Pisces knows how to rest, but because Pisces knows how to be cozy.

I cannot see the picture of Homer Simpson cocooned in blankets, proclaiming himself a “big, toasty cinnamon bun” without immediately questioning if Homer is a Pisces. (He’s a Taurus, I looked it up. Believe me yet on the “best sleeper” moniker?)

Pisces likes to be cozy no matter where he is (please never let him leave the house in one…), and that’s why The Comfy Hoodie is perfect for the fish. He’ll be swimming in it, no matter how big or small he is, because this hoodie is made to be overwhelming. And overwhelmingly soft. I ordered one for my S.O. and I, and we didn’t take ours off except to climb into bed.

We had a video call with my best friend and the judgment on her face, as she asked “Are you two wearing Snuggies?” was unmistakable.

But Pisces don’t care, Pisces is COMFY. And no, this is no Snuggie, this is WAY better. 

Now What? There’s Romance in the Air…

Well, together we’ve made it through TWENTY-SIX different options to give your honey for Valentine’s Day. And whether you went with their sun, or moon, or rising (if you know it!) sign, I’d bet money that you nail it this year, and will get to enjoy the fruits of your research until the next opportunity to give a gift! In which case, take that time to learn your and your significant other’s birth charts and expand your gift-giving talents.

But we all know Valentine’s, and every day, is about more than just the presents, it’s about nurturing each other’s love languages as well.

So if you have a bit more planning to do for your day together, here’s a few solid options to consider as the cherry on top:

Given the romance in the air, it’s more than a little likely you’ll be looking for the perfect libation to lighten the mood and ease the communication between you. Whatever their preference, I’ve got you covered.

Does a classic bottle of red wine suit their tastes? Look to No Fine Print’s Cabernet Sauvignon, Tempranillo, or Syrah. The very first sentence on the brand’s “About” page is “Wine is often taken too seriously.” As an avid drinker myself, I enjoy learning about the tasting techniques, and notes in certain bottles, but I can also appreciate not everyone feels that way. I agree with No Fine Print that wine shouldn’t be intimidating, stuffy, or unapproachable. It should just taste good. And damn does theirs ever. This is always a safe bet for a homemade meal, or turning the lights down low after.

Maybe one or both of you work in the service industry, and are planning on getting that paper during the romantic dinner rush on Sunday. Since I can’t sit at every single one of your tables, please know I’m tipping you in “abundance vibes” from here.

And I’ve got you covered on the “day date drinking” so you and your date can still enjoy yourselves before clocking in. If you’re like me, I plan on starting with bubbles at brunch and getting a little fancier as the day progresses. In which case, may I introduce you to Hey Mama Wines and Nectar of the Vine? Hey Mama’s bubbly rosé is absolutely scrumptious, and pairs well with some juice, if you catch my drift. What’s even sweeter is it comes in a can, so you can comfortably take your brunch picnic-style, and not worry about breaking any glass.

Of course, don’t be an ass and pack it in, pack it out. As the day progresses and you’re looking for something a little more fun and fruity, Nectar of the Vine’s wine frappés are the perfect fit! They have very nearly every frozen cocktail flavor you could ever want, in a neat little slushy kit! What I like the most about their kits is while they’re branded as “wine” frappés, the mixing bag includes the measuring ratios to use liquor as well, so, as Nectar of the Vine says, “Spike it how you like it!” and get the party started!

Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone!

 

Feature Photo by NeONBRAND on Unsplash