New Book is a Timely Exploration of One Man Confronting His Sexual Identity Growing up in the Rural South

In an era where the importance of LGBTQ rights and representation is more significant than ever, author Tate Barkley has released a powerful and timely book titled Sunday Dinners, Moonshine, and Men. This compelling book tells Tate’s story of growing up in the small towns of North Carolina, where money was tight, dreams seldom came true, and family secrets were kept hidden.

For years Tate Barkley lived his life in shame—of living in poverty, of alcoholism and addiction, of being a closeted gay man. His story may sound familiar to anyone who struggles with feeling “less than.” Sunday Dinners, Moonshine and Men recounts Tate’s troubled relationship with his father and his journey to overcome shame and the scarcity mindset that blocked his ability to find peace in his life. Tate offers readers a deeply personal account of his dysfunctional childhood, from the backwoods of North Carolina, to his family’s struggles with poverty in Central Florida, and their ultimate move to the boomtown of 1970s Houston, Texas. He details his attempts to repress his sexuality and control his escalating drinking as he became a successful attorney, only to hit rock bottom and lose it all.

Sunday Dinners, Moonshine, and Men is a masterfully crafted story that weaves together themes of love, acceptance, and self-discovery against the backdrop of small town America. Tate explores the struggles, triumphs, and complexities of being LGBTQ, shedding light on the need for empathy, understanding, and unity.

This is a Southern boy’s story of surviving in a good ole boys’ world. Tate fought his way back, ended a life built on lies, and forged a path to accept his true self―with or without his father’s love. Now sober through Alcoholics Anonymous, he shares his story in the hopes that it will help others to leave their shame behind and discover the peace that they deserve.

Tate Barkley

Why did you decide to write the book?

My dad passed away a few years ago and as I was grappling with our relationship history, I leaned on the Alcoholics Anonymous tradition of writing my feelings. I asked our law firm’s transcriptionist to type up what I wrote so that I could absorb it and then I put it down. A few months later, she asked me if I had more for her to transcribe and I said, “No. Why?” She said, “I wanted to know what happened with you and your dad!” So when the pandemic sent us all home and I had extra time on my hands, I decided to sit down and finish the story.

What was it like for you being gay growing up in the South?  What challenges did you face?

I grew up in the 1970s and 1980s when being gay was not something that anyone talked about, especially in rural North Carolina where I was born. My family attended a fundamentalist Christian church, and, in that tradition, they taught that homosexuality was a sin and that once you gave into it, you were forever marked as an abomination. So, I spent the better part of my youth repressing my feelings and ultimately used alcohol to help me do so.

You talk about drinking as a teen and as an adult, what made you decide to turn your life around?

I hit rock bottom in the most classic way possible. I lost my home, my law practice, and many friends. I was forced to move home and live with my parents. As I descended more deeply into my addiction, I contemplated suicide. But I was fortunate to recall the advice of a friend of mine who was a doctor, AJ was his name. He advised me many times to check myself into Hazelden because it had a reputation for being the best rehabilitation facility in the country. AJ was one of several angels in my life who pointed me in the direction of sobriety. I am forever grateful to them.

What do you hope readers will take away from your story?

I hope that people who read my book find comfort in the fact that I was able to find a way to survive poverty, abandonment, repression, and alcoholism and develop the resilience I needed to rebuild my life. There really is hope in learning the truth of who you are and sharing it with others. I also find that service to others keeps me grounded in this truth.

Tate Barkley is a practicing attorney, speaker, author, and educator.  He is a founding partner of Bain & Barkley law firm in Houston, Texas, and a graduate of the University of Texas and South Texas College of Law. In addition to his active law practice, he spent 20 years as an adjunct professor at the University of Houston, teaching Communications Law and Ethics, where he was awarded the School of Communications 2019 Valenti Award for Outstanding Teaching by a Lecturer.  Tate presently serves as President of the Board of Directors for Avenue Community Development Corp. in Houston, which provides affordable housing for veterans, seniors, and the working poor. He is a past board member of the Texas Council for Advising and Planning for the Prevention and Treatment of Mental and Substance Abuse Disorders, and he formerly served on the Fort Bend Regional Council on Substance Abuse board, whose mission is to provide families and individuals the substance abuse prevention, education, and treatment services needed for positive change for themselves and the community.  Tate lives in Houston with his husband of six years, Anson, and their dog, Emerson.  For more information visit TateBarkley.com.